Get to know me!! Bobby Johnson - Vanderbilt

Welcome to part one of twelve in our debut series, "Get to know me!!", introducing you to the coaches of the Southeastern Conference. First up, the dadgum nicest coach in all of the land..Vanderbilt's Bobby Johnson.

I'm Bobby Johnson - GET TO KNOW ME!

Vanderbilt's Bobby Johnson faces a rather difficult task year in and year out. As head coach of the SEC version of Duke (minus the happy go lucky lacrosse hijinks and the utter hate-ability--maybe not very Duke-ish at all, except for the losing football team) Bobby must recruit and coach a team to play in the SEC that needs to have graduated high school with roughly the grades of an Asian engineering student at Georiga Tech. Good luck Bobby!

Last year, Bobby trusted in the arms and legs of first round draft pick and current Jake Plummer beard trimmer Jay Cutler all the way to a 5-6 record. FIVE AND SIX PEOPLE! This is quite similar to Chan Gailey breaking equilibrium and winning nine games. Things like this just don't happen. And it included winning SEC games ON THE ROAD as well as a victory over Bob's Big Orange. And had they not somehow lost to MTSU, Vandy would have gone bowling. Also, its likely that the world would have come off its axis as this would have meant that Johnson had completed the Sisyphusian task of rolling the boulder up the hill. Where would one go after taking Vandy to a bowl? Another bowl? Keep thinking that way you beautiful dreamer. Vandy doesn't even have an athletic department, what could they do with a bowl game? It was mighty cute of them to try though.

Bobby Johnson hard at work scheming for the MTSU game

Aside from losing lots of games, what else does Bobby do at Vanderbilt? Well, he certainly dosen't swear, I'll tell ya that much. One of the few things I've ever seen about Vandy on ESPN was regarding Bobby's no-swearing policy. And good for them, we all know swearing dosen't win ballgames - it just makes them more enjoyable. Conversely though, how can one be in the SEC without swearing? Are we certain Vandy is still a league member and we didn't kick them out with Sewanee back in the 1920s?

So, what have we learned about Head Coach Bobby Johnson? He keeps rolling the boulder up the hill no matter how few wins may be in store, he thought about going to a bowl game last year, but decided not having an athletic department that they might as well lose 6 games and not go, and he out dueled the Fat Man and therefore cost Captain Kripy Kreme a bowl as well. Nice job Bobby.